Free Yourself From These Seven Things

Free yourself from these seven things

Sometimes, for your own good, it’s better to say goodbye to certain people for good . However, someone can become so deeply rooted in your life, and as it were dug in, that it seems almost impossible to take any distance. That is precisely why it is terribly difficult to leave, for example, your partner – with whom you may have been together for many years and who live in the same house, or to remove yourself physically and emotionally from him or her at all. The same applies to old friends, acquaintances or colleagues who in principle, in practice, no longer contribute anything to your daily existence and functioning.

Gathering the courage to cut through such Gordian knots, that is, daring to leave, actually breaking up, helps you grow as a person and frees you from all the excuses that have kept you grounded for so long, when the situation was actually untenable. This is the time to break free. The time for renewal, and progress, is now.

In this article we list the most important psychological burdens. Often our handicap is not so much that we do not know how to let go of something or someone, but mainly that we are unsure about who and what exactly. Fortunately, that’s all going to change. Brace yourself – the train of transformation is approaching!

It’s time to say goodbye

Few are willing to step up, walk away anyway – and even fewer people actually do so. The key is to bring the momentum of your own past—and your own habituation to it—to a halt. First of all, you have to defy the force of habit that pushes you in the wrong direction, and let it disintegrate. Only then – spontaneously – new possibilities, untrodden paths, and you can develop brand new mental and behavioral dynamics.

Of course, we often hold onto that dead weight unconsciously, because we are unable to clearly re-recognise and recognize what is weighing us down. That’s why we present here seven superfluous sandbags that prevent your existential hot-air balloon from flying freely. Don’t take shelter in things that harm you, but break the spell – like a snake snapping from its old, too small skin.

1. Resistance

From time to time you experience – in your doings – a painful lack of harmony, and any sense of happiness seems far out of reach. The main cause of this is that something is holding you back or blocking you. Perhaps it is an irrational fear that prevents you from turning your life in the right direction.

No longer chain yourself to lead balls , or to the bars that hold you captive. Nobody forces you to, or even expects you to do so. It is you alone who compulsively anchor you to such self-imposed limitations. Cease the resistance, and kick in the door of your own fear (or cell). Because what you cling to so frantically does not in reality offer the security, nor the confidence, that you project onto it in such a panic.

Identify what’s hitting you so fiercely in the armor, and let it go! Resistance always backfires: it freezes and exacerbates the unwanted situation that robbed you of your peace of mind anyway. Only you yourself are in a position to withdraw from this mechanism. Be sensible, and change (your approach).

2. Limitations

Our beliefs hold us back much more severely than we think. For example, if you dislike or dislike something, it’s probably because you never took the risk or bother to try it yourself so that you could be proven wrong. And even if you do dare to do it, the slightest setback or a fussy inconvenience will put you off. Remember, then, that your ego-mind is by default out to prove your prejudices, rather than conquer them. That is his (or her) specialty.

Realize that all barriers that appear to be outside of you are in fact put up by yourself. Ultimately, no one is responsible for that except you – those so-called boundaries are your own creation. That’s why you’re the only one who can take them away at all. The fate of everything that bothers you psychologically and emotionally is in your hands.

Don’t get caught up in your dreams, and don’t stifle your ideals. Shake off your own straitjacket. Feel free and unbeatable – ready to fulfill your most passionate desires. Get to know your biggest blocks, and destroy them from within. Nothing stands in the way of your best possible future.

3. Unrealistic Expectations

Most of our personal forecasts are usually rather naive and simplistic. There is little wrong with that in itself, were it not for the fact that they are – unfortunately – the source of unfounded hope that – in the desert that our world can sometimes be – evaporates dangerously quickly. The inevitable result: frustration, mistrust and disappointment.

Saying goodbye to expectations remains a particularly big challenge, because we constantly measure our (near) future against, and orientate on, the path they have mapped out. The most deplorable thing is that, moreover, in many cases they come from other people, who – often out of self-interest – try to impose their will on us.

Think back to the times when you were anxiously expecting something from someone. What was the result? Disappointing, humiliating – or not? For your own good, and that of others: do not succumb to the trick of expectations and learn to accept. Only by letting go of this expectant neurosis will you rediscover the joy of happiness.

4. Fears

Fears are like gigantic obstacles that block our free path to satisfying our needs, or like towering walls that lock us in our comfort zone. The only remedy is to look that which you are so afraid of, straight in the face, without blinking, and let your fear melt away like snow in the sun. For therein lies the true value, and function, of fear: it helps you grow beyond your own former ceiling and cocoon.

If you, with patience and fearlessness, dissect and analyze your fears, you are bound to discover that they originate with you, and that almost all of them are unfounded. That you once created them, and kept them, without really knowing why. Take the fear of loneliness, or of speaking in public – are they insurmountable?

Face your fear. Don’t run away if he looms in the distance, but confront him. Then you will experience that fear is not a bogeyman or hindrance, but – when approached correctly – just a positive push-in-the-back, a stimulus. Flip the perspective 180 degrees and use fear as a motivator, a counselor that shows you exactly and flawlessly when and where you are holding yourself hostage , paralyzing yourself.

5. Attachment

Many people cling almost desperately to another—or others —because they have convinced themselves that their salvation depends entirely on this or that one. That is not an innocent, and even a perilous mistake. If that were true, your happiness would always hang by a wafer-thin silk thread.

Learn to see and experience yourself as a complete being who does not necessarily need others to be happy. It’s no small feat to say goodbye to years of ingrained affection, emotional dependence, and the habit of making – and holding – others responsible for your own happiness. Yet that is – absolutely – what you need to do.

Get used to enduring this freedom and aloneness, and especially don’t connect with someone else for the fear that you can’t make decisions on your own. Those who want to feel good with and about themselves, prefer freedom.

6. The Past

Why do you like to dig your head in the sand of the past? Is it not always the present that really matters, and where you should focus your attention, so that inner happiness and outer prosperity may be yours? Sure, learn from your past, but don’t dwell on it. Use it as fuel for your life in the here and now – because that ‘s all that matters.

A lot of people get entangled in the maze of their own past, and as a result lose contact with, and concentration on, the present. That is why it is so important to contemplate carefully the things that still hurt, that you have not yet been able to let go or overcome. Once you know what that is, you have the chance to actively work on it.

Anyone who has freed himself mentally from his own past realizes that it was – in practice – much less difficult than he had always thought. Suddenly you find yourself fresh as a daisy in the present moment, and you can shape your future both consciously and current. Occasionally looking back on the past is not a bad idea, but trying to live in it is.

7. Guilt

Many people blame others for their own actions. Yet, ultimately, you should never hold anyone accountable for your own decisions, just as you are never held accountable for other people’s actions.

Learn to take responsibility for your own actions without feeling needlessly guilty about them. Any decision – no matter how good the intentions were – can have negative consequences. If your performance unintentionally goes bad, you can at least – and that’s the good thing – learn something from it, so you can do better next time.

That is why – when you have decided on something – you have to accept the outcome at all costs. Every choice has consequences, left or right. And letting regret consume you never makes sense. You can probably try to make up for your mistake and learn something from it, but stopping time, or reversing your decision, is impossible.

Do you lose more than you gain when you say goodbye to the above seven things? We cling to so many things – letting go remains a difficult art of living. Still, it pays to do your very best. Being able to say goodbye is the most precious asset that will ever be available to you for free.

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